Sometimes I traveled alone, sometimes there were others that took the wheel, and took my heart. But when the destination was reached it wasn't me who arrived, it wasn't me at all. And once you lose yourself you have two choices: find the person you used to be, or lose that person completely. Because sometimes you have to step outside of the person you've been and remember the person you were meant to be, the person you wanted to be .... the person you are.
--one tree hill

ive been really down lately. i hate it. i was ona roll with the whole happy thing and then it seemed like everything started crashin in around me. i just feel like something isnt right and i cant totally pinpoint it. when i THINK ive found it, and get rid of it, im STILL sad becuz  then im like, dammit i lost something else and it sucks and i want it back. its like i cant make up my mind! its driving me INSANE!

& i know my friends are tired of me complaining about the same old things.. its not like their advice is getting any different, or like theres any other ideas. im in the SAME damn predicament and im pissed.

i hate drama. i was successful at stayin away from fuckin drama and now it seems like i cant get away from it.. i let one thing in and everything else comes runnin with it

goddammit.

at least tomorrow is thanksgiving--- im excited for that.